I TOTALLy understand this feeling of emptiness. All I have ever craved is a child of my own. I got pregnant once, but unfortunately, my partner at that time FORCED me into termination. I split with him! I found out in 2005 that I was actually diagnosed with PCOS in 1997, and did not know! I was told if I lose weight, I can have fertility treatment, but as I suffer from PCOS VERY severely, I am still struggling to lose weight. Have been told now that cut off age for treatment is 40, and I am now 41. We cannot afford to go private. We did think of adoption, but due to health problems, and hubby in denial of a drink problem, we can't do that either. I crave the feeling of holding MY child in my arms, and being called MOMMY... :(
Feb 10, 2010
I too know that feeling by: Michelle
I too know that feeling, years of hoping, hoping that next year a miracle will happen, each month saying this is it, then heartbreak, suffering each test that is done to see why, asking yourself why, questioning yourself what have I done wrong, is it me, thinking what if it's him/ her, but then it's made more difficult to accept, when they tell you it's unexplained infertility, you have been chosen not to have children, no reason given, you will just have to watch all your friends and loved ones have them and love them....
Feb 08, 2010
May others find comfort in your poem by: Fion
Oh CC, there's much pain and anguish in this poem of yours.... I believe readers will sense your deep feelings. I hope other women who are going through similar situations will find solace in your words and understand that somewhere out there, there are others who face similar heartache and emptiness and that they are not alone. May you find comfort through writing and may you regain peace of heart one day.
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