With God All Things Are Possible - Visitor's Story

by John Fitts
(Palm Harbor, FL USA)

“The doctor told me that I would not live past Christmas.� I heard these words during my August visit with Lynn Bessinger, a 70-year-old patient with breast cancer, soon after her admission to hospice. The news had sent the patient and family into a whirlwind of short term crisis planning. Every special day was looked upon as the last opportunity experience. Halloween, Thanksgiving, and especially Christmas was anticipated with a certain sense of foreboding. With each approaching day loomed the specter of the “process� beginning in earnest. Care giving arrangements were made with the idea that anything was “doable� for a few months. Lynn called upon me as a hospice chaplain to help her prepare for death. We spoke often about spiritual issues and even discussed funeral plans. Together we all waited, and waited, and waited.

While Lynn’s anxiety increased as Christmas neared, she began to slowly show some limited, yet significant improvement. She started setting goals and making plans beyond the appointed time. Suddenly Easter passed and then summer stared us in the face. Short term plans of family and care givers began to cause tensions, with understandable frustrations and guilt. Lynn was not immune from feelings of despondency. Doubts surfaced not with the prospect of dying, but what purpose God might have in living.

From Lynn’s perspective her illness was producing a mixed blessing. On the one hand, she saw her granddaughter leave the Army, move close to home and have a baby. She was able to address some issues that had been suppressed over for years and bring closure to them. On the other hand, she witnessed disruption of family members lives brought on by her illness. She was unable to leave her bedroom except for visits to the doctor or very short strolls by those who pushed her wheelchair. It was difficult for her to grasp any significant purpose in her life as she now saw it.

As Lynn approached the second Christmas since the doctor’s pronouncement, a new option developed. For several weeks she vacillated between staying at home where she felt comfortable and secure, and moving to “Woodside,� the resident hospice facility. Any change is difficult, but with a dying person each takes on a symbolic quality that adds ominous overtones. The stress caused by care giving needs at home increased so that the decision became obvious. To relieve burden on the family, and to maintain the care she needed, Lynn made the move. The adjustment was made easier by being able to decorate her private room much like her bedroom at home. Visitors were free to come and go, and she received quality care from a trained staff of nurses, nurse’s aids, social workers, and a chaplain. At her request I visited the facility as her chaplain. She quickly made herself at home, but her doubt lingered.

Shortly after Lynn entered Woodside, she received a visit from a reporter from the nationwide publication, “USA Today.� She had been chosen to be one of two interviewed concerning her views of “Doctor Assisted Suicide.� Lynn talked of her faith in God and how, in spite of a prolonged terminal illness, she still believed that only God had the right to determine length of life. She spoke calmly and clearly of how her beliefs as a Christian were relevant to the decision to end life. Even in the face of unanswered questions, she still trusted God.

Lynn had not applied for the interview. She was surprised that it ever made it into print. Both her words of faith and her picture appeared on January 8, 1997 all across the country. She and the lady who expressed opposing views became local celebrities among her family and new friends at Hospice. Then she began to receive responses to the article. Judy wrote, “I praise the Lord Jesus Christ for other Christians who take a stand on highly debated moral issues. Reading the article on your beliefs in ‘USA Today’ I was moved to tears for your pain and suffering but more so for the precious rewards our Lord Jesus has waiting for you in heaven!�
In another letter, Mary wrote, “I read about you in ‘USA Today’ and I needed to write you to commend you for your courage in speaking out against ‘Doctor Assisted Suicide.’ But more than commending you--I will pray for you every day. You know the secret-- that God is sovereign and our hope is in Him--even when we don’t understand.�

The most encouraging letter came from Bill:

Dear Lynn,

I, along with many other I’m sure, was touched by the article about you in �?USA Today’ last week and wanted to write to affirm your faithfulness. In the article’s concluding quote you say that “God has a reason for everything.� If I may be so presumptuous, let me say that it strikes me that one of the ‘reasons’ God has allowed your situation, as He did with Job, is to show the world your steadfastness. Who can calculate how many millions read of you in USA Today?

For believers, yours is a story of hope and reaffirmation. In Psalm 89 God promises not to break off His lovingkindness to us and it is every Christian’s prayer that God will be true to His promise in seeing us through the valleys that lie ahead for us all. Lynn, you are an example of how God does not forsake us when the storms come. Our hopes are rekindled when we see a fellow believer’s faith helping them through adversity and God honoring His promise.

Also, what a witness you are to those who look to the future with utter hopelessness because they don’t know what awaits them beyond this life. To see you persevering in your struggle with the ‘hope that does not disappoint’ has to touch them, and hopefully move them to seek the peace that you have.

Lynn, I promise to pray for you, and that your faith will continue to abound in the midst of your illness. You are an inspiration to us all.

Your brother in Christ, Bill.

It was three weeks after the article appeared that I next visited Lynn. What a difference! There was no visible outward change, but I became gradually aware of a quiet, settled confidence. Lynn made no boastful claims that revealed a burgeoning ego. She was amazed at what God had done. A timid personality had squelched a desire to share her faith in years past and then the disease seemed to put an end to any possibility. But a sovereign God had overcome both obstacles so that she became an encouragement to more people than she had ever imagined possible.

Lynn’s question was answered and she has peace. God graciously allowed her to see why she was living. Now she is ready to live or die. Not everyone gets so clear an answer. Perhaps her answer will enable others to live for Him by faith without seeing how it works out. That, I think is what Bill saw. I believe that is the way God works.